June 28, 2005


  • “Friend is a four-letter word. End is the only part of the word I heard.” -Cake

    Why say hello if it’s only going to become a goodbye? I hate goodbyes,
    so I’m reconsidering saying hello. You know, in Hawaii it’s the same,
    aloha.



    I’m not the type to deal with goodbyes very well. Sure the time while
    it lasts is good. But the withdrawel will last equally long and
    twice as harsh. I’m a sentimental person, I’m a packrat, I like to keep
    things, and I get sad when I have to let things go. Except I don’t
    choose to let people go. They leave beyond my control.



    I’ve been really sad lately. Only because I miss those I’ve already said
    goodbye to and I’ve been saying even more goodbyes lately. I don’t want
    to say hello anymore because I don’t want to say goodbye. I’d rather be
    dependent on anime and food. At least I can always depend on those
    things being there.



    Everytime I meet someone new now, I feel like I can see the future. I
    feel like I can see our friendship ending, growing apart, drifting. I
    can see all good things coming to an end. So why even begin?



    Sorry to new people. You probably feel me pushing you away. Now you
    know why.